WHEN LOVE ISN'T ENOUGH: DO THESE!

God is Love & Love is God but God did something for human kind out of love by giving up his own only beloved begotten son whom he loved to die for us  John 3:16.

That means it takes more than "I Love You", I mean "I love you" is not enough but trust me only LOVE personified with action is the bedrock of Relationship.

There's a need to know a clearly marked difference exist between "I love you" nowadays and "LOVE" because 95% of those who say the former doesn't understand the latter.

Could they have known what Love is & what it entails, they wouldn't dare saying it. We have so much compare love & lust that the two words have become confusables and even when a person knows he's in lust, such still express it as been in love.

So today, let's look at exactly what love is as recorded in the Bible which is eternally correct & right. Don't be deceived, anytime you see yourself arguing with what is written in the bible, I'm afraid you're missing it and until you accept you're the one that will always be wrong in the light of the scripture. You'll only be seeing the letters that kills.

So whatever you might have known about Love before now, any of them that's not right with the definition of the Bible is wrong amd and be ready to adjust.

According to 1Corinthians 13:4-7, I will list out 12 things that must be added to LOVE to make your relationship worthwhile but keep this in your mind: LOVE IS YES A FEELING BUT ACTION PERSONIFIED

It is because we have failed to understand this biblical meaning of love that it seems as if love is not enough for our relationships.  I'll make a few comments about the above scriptural verses then we'll move from there to see what can be added to this CORRECT LOVE to make the best out of our relationship.

Add to LOVE:

1. Long suffering: Is there anyone here who actually wants to suffer in relationship? Of course the answer is No but the Bible said love suffers long. 

Not only suffer but suffers long. Check it out if you are not willing to suffer with your partner, it simply means you needed to add it to your love. 

You think God was celebrating in heaven when Jesus was been crucified, God has to chose whom to love at that moment between Jesus & the world. It's a hard decision to make, consider yourself sacrificing your child to save another person.

2. Kindness: According to Wikipedia, Kindness is a behavior marked by ethical characteristics, a pleasant disposition, and concern and consideration for others. 

It is considered a virtue, and is recognized as a value in many cultures and religions. You should know that philosopher 'Aristotle" he defines kindness as "helpfulness towards someone in need, not in return for anything, nor for the advantage of the helper himself, but for that of the person helped". 

Many of us think because we love someone, then will should be on their payroll, having a sense of entitlement & special belonging but the magic works like a spell if we give ourselves to be spent rather than been spend on.

3. Null envy: envy & jealousy are negative emotions from feelings that comes from reality but are not true.

 The fact that you see your partner around an opposite sex doesn't mean such is cheating. 

Instead of been jealous, learn to accommodate such person especially when your partner has explained to you who they really are.

 Some ladies will pray their future husband should not have a mother & some guys will do all to send away male friends from their partner, that's not love. Change for better, get matured.

4. Null Boast : anytime you see yourself as something special that must worshipped by your partner, you didn't love. 

Why do you have to flaunt yourself in front him/her always intimidating your partner with your achievement or what you have. 

More than love, you need learn how to keep a good self esteem to your partner.

5. Null proudness: pride they say come before destruction. 

You must add to your love meekness with your partner. 

No matter who you are and what you have, you must not be proud around your partner.

 Even if you truly love someone & the person see you to be proud, it's only a matter of time before they run away from you.

6. Null rudeness: who likes a rude person? None. 

You must ensure the manner at which you communicate with your partner is full of respect. 

Talk to him/her like you'll talk to a king or queen because that's who they really are to you. 

Love can be deceptive but respect shows the true colour. Respect your partner's opinion, suggestion & observation, let him/her know you value their thoughts.

7. Null self-seeking: it's not about you alone anymore once you are in Relationship. It's about "we & us".

 Selfishness accounts for reasons why some folks cheat on their partner even though they really love the person but they never considered how much the partner will be badly hurt when he/she discovered they are been cheated on. 

Such people feel at least, it doesn't affect my partner if I cheat, I can do what I like with my body while I love my partner. 

So don't be selfish with your love cos it's a mutual feeling. Let me also point it out that you don't force someone to love you because you love them, if it's reciprocated good but if not don't be selfish rather look elsewhere for love.

8. Null anger; more than love, each partner must be able to control their anger, anytime you are angry with your partner, remember how wonderful he/she has been to you & calm your nerves. 

Anger can cost you to lose what you've been labouring on to secure your relationship over the years in a jiffy.

9. Null record of wrong: don't pile up the offences of your partner and wait for a time you'll unleash everything on him/her but rather talk about any differences immediately and resolve it so you can move on. 

When you remind your partner of the wrongs they have done to you in time past, it hurts him/her alot and believe me nobody wants to live with someone who remind them of their shortcomings Everytime. 

So if you love your partner, learn to forgive and forget within the shortest possible time.

 

10. Null covering of evil: you don't say because you love someone, you wouldn't talk to them when they are doing something wrong especially to another person. 

Anytime you see your partner doing anything against norms, you're meant to correct them in love not to spare the rod while spoiling the child. 

The reason why you've to speak against these things is because if your partner find it easy doing evil to someone else, it'll only take a little time before he/she does that to you unknowingly & trust me guys, it's gonna be fatal cos nobody will get your back.

11. rejoicing with the true; you should be the first person to commend your partner anytime they're do something good or celebrate an achievement.

 Pls don't forget your partner birthday, & send a message in the evening "sorry dear, better late than never". 

It annoying, you're supposed to be the one to wake him/her up with your call. 

Rejoice with them every opportunity you have, stay around them let them know you're involved in their life and what makes them happy makes you happy also.

11. Protection; you must defend the course of your partner no matter what. 

It's more honorable to protect the image of your partner behind them and later discovered they committed the offence accused of rather than been unprotecting and get to know they didn't commit such crime. 

Learn to take embarrassment for whom you love. You must realize that you're the most important person to your partner & you must not miss any opportunity to have them in a secured position.

12. Trust:, I don't know how else to define this rather than telling you that no matter what happens. You must first trust your partner before any external person.

 It's always frustrating when your partner has to defend themselves always before you believe their words. Learn to trust, it actually pays off than not trusting. 

If you add all of this to your love and you take time to let your partner know the importance of doing this thing also and you're still struggling to win your partner over, please leave that relationship immediately because it will eventually end in tears.

Some of us can predict the future of any Relationship with the presence and absence of any this factors because we have seen it as the bed rock on which those who eventually enjoys their marriage built their love Relationship. 

Don't relax, don't slack, don't be deceived, relationship can break but don't get locked up in an unsuitable marriage. 

Don't get married and wish you are still single. Use your single days to attend conference, read books on relationship & listen to teachings from great speakers.

The day you earn your degree is not the day you gained admission and the day you gained admission is not the day you determined to attend school.

 So is relationship, learn about it before you enter into it, don't get into it and start learning by trial and error. It'll cost you your heart. Anything that's worth doing is merited to be done well Relationship inclusive.

In conclusion

Can we read Proverbs 24:3 & 23:7

Having known all this as recorded  in the book  of Proverbs to guard your heart so diligently for out of it comes the issues of life..... As a man thinketh, so he is.

Stop thinking about failure in relationship because the more you think about it the more you see it come to reality. 

Forget past relationship failures, the fact that your parents doesn't have a happy home doesn't mean you won't have it. 

Don't settle for the less but rather think always about positive thoughts about your relationship, think about the wonderful things you want to see in it, meditate on having a happy home and the more you think about it, the more you would begin to look for ways to make it a reality.

Finally Philippians 4:8

Think about those wonderful things, meditate on them, envision them and see them come to reality even in your life and Relationship.

Advice: DON'T PUT YOUR HEART INTO RELATIONSHIP BUT YOUR HEAD. KNOW THAT IT CAN FAIL ANYTIME, SO PREPARE FOR THE WORSE WHILE YOU DO THE BEST YOU CAN DO TO SUSTAIN IT BUT ONCE IT FAILS MOVE ON.

But you remembered the latter part of that John 3:16 I quoted earlier, that whoever believe in Jesus Christ whom he sent out of love may not perish but have everlasting life. If you've not accepted the grace of salvation, here is another opportunity to make it straight with your maker. Just believe in your heart that Jesus Christ is your Lord & saviour, renounce your sin, welcome into a new life of God's supreme love.

Any man who has not encountered this Jesus Christ love can never be opened to the secret of Love that births eternal rest in God, so you've made a right decision. 

I pray God will bless you with His presence and write your name in the book of Life with the blood of the lamb-Jesus Christ.

Do you need further clarifications in all of these matters, drop a message in the comment section and I would arrange how we can hook up on social media for discussion. You can as well purchase my book "LOVE TILL OLD AGE" inside of which all these are extensively expatiated.

Your Relationship Coach

Adegboyega Emmanuel

Emmanuela D'a Muse